12 May: A Little Help: Selwyn Estate - Lydia

[Bronwyn Nott]

Leaning against the doorframe to the Selwyn Estate, Bronwyn’s only satisfaction was knowing that she’d caused more injury to Emmeline Vance than the injuries she had sustained. However, those that had been on the other side of today’s attack had gotten their fair share of shots in, and she wasn’t doing her friend any favors by bleeding on her front door. Normally she would have felt guilty about showing up unannounced to Lydia’s house - but this had been the reason her friend had become a Healer, hadn’t it? To help their side when they were in need?

After Dumbledore had shown up they had all be dismissed, apparating out of the town with Death Eater’s she had been near. She didn’t know if anyone else had been hurt, or if they were even alive. It had been chaos, which was the point of the attack in the first place. Still, when she’d agreed to this last summer, this wasn’t had been what she was expecting. She was just a Recruiter, most of her time spent at the Ministry with Aaron gathering information and reporting it back. But a fight like today’s? Sure, they’d been training for it, preparing for a while….

But that didn’t mean she wasn’t having doubts. Knocking on the door, she looked at the elf that answered with annoyance, hand covering the gash on her arm that was still dripping blood. “Don’t just stand there - get Lydia,” she snapped, pushing into the house. She’d had her share of Quidditch injuries over the years, skillfully patched up in the hospital wing at school. But having her arm broken by a Bludger was nothing compared to the stinging of the cuts and scrapes she had sustained today.

[Lydia Avery]

It would be a lie for Lydia Selwyn to state that she hadn’t prepared for this day. Making arrangements for her work schedule at St. Mungo’s to accommodate this "day off," spending the week since she’d learned of the scheduled attack on Hogsmeade to ensure her personal stores of potions, salves, and pastes were stocked and nothing was past its expiry, giving Tinmey strict instructions on how they would proceed once family and friends began arriving, that after kissing Charlie goodbye this morning she’d turned their parlor into a makeshift hospital room in preparation for patients…

This was why she’d gotten herself through healer training at that mudblood-loving hospital. To help those she loved when they were hurt, to give them a safe space to recover, to make sure that they were healed properly. While Lydia would have much preferred that others were fighting in their place, she had long learned that arguing with these hard-headed fighters was fruitless. So what more could she do than ensure their well being when the fight-of-the-day was done?

Besides, she’d always loved being needed. In a perfect world, none of those she loved would need her services today, but…it doesn’t hurt for them to see what you can do.

So far her only patient was her husband, who’d stumbled home in an irate state, nose broken and bloody, a few of his perfect teeth shattered. After some admonishment - "Muggle dueling, Charlie, really?" - she’d begun treating him. But she’d only cleared away the blood from the most prominent wound, set and healed his nose, when their elf led in an old friend.

"Winnie, darling!"

Leaving a complaining Charlie in his favorite armchair - now charmed to repel blood and other nastiness so that the red only pooled atop it and didn’t sink in, such as the rest of the furniture and carpeting in the room - Lydia rushed to the injured blonde, gingerly leading her to a chaise near her husband. Her dark brown eyes flitted over the pair of them, and she quickly pulled her thick hair back into a ponytail.

"All right. Charlie, you’re fine, I’ll get to your teeth soon." She allowed herself the relief of a long exhale over his incoherent protestations before getting to business. "I promise I will take care of you, but I need you to be patient. My patients." She granted them a brief smile before shushing her husband and turning her wand on Bronwyn. "Winnie, the more you can tell me about what happened, specifically to you, the better I’ll be able to treat you. Tergeo." She moved her wand over her friend’s visible injuries, forcing the blood to leave her skin and clothes and collect on the lounge, so as to be able to better assess the damage…

(ooc: as an fyi...this house elf name generator exists XD)

[Bronwyn Nott]

Lydia, pretty as ever, was quick to come to her aide once Bronwyn was lead in the parlor where her friend was. It looked like her old school friend was well prepared for injured visitors today, with potions and salves neatly gathered. Winnie gave a nod to Charlie, although she did wish he wasn’t around. She’d always tolerated him for Lydia’s sake, but he certainly wasn’t one of her favorite people to be around. But we’re on the same side, although he looks worse than you do at least. She sunk down into the chaise that Lydia let her too, glad to finally be someplace where she could relax. Her shoulders were aching, and not only from the tension of the fight. She smirked at Charlie, pleased to hear Lydia shushing him when complained. It appeared that someone had gotten in a few good punches to Mr. Selwyn’s face, and in another time and place Bronwyn would have found it amusing.

Right now, she was simply glad that she was the focus of Lydia’s attention.

“Vance happened,” she muttered, finally able to see the gash on her shoulder that was causing her so much pain. Holding out her left hand, she looked at the blisters that were covering it, giving a sigh. “She put a curse on the door, Flagrante would be my best guess. Although that didn’t stop us,” she let herself laugh, the way her old Ravenclaw schoolmate had cried out in pain after a well placed Bombara on the door to the tea shop still ringing in her ears. “Most of it is probably glass or wood from Puddifoots, the place isn’t going to recover quickly. And she definitely got a good stinging jinx off on me.”

[Lydia Avery]

"Heavens, Charles - I'll be forcing a Sleeping Draught down your throat if you don't stop your yammering, don't think that I won't." Her husband wasn't prone to enjoy being "ignored," but at least he had enough sense to prefer consciousness to the alternative, and subsequently quieted. We'll see how long it lasts, Lydia thought, containing a burdensome sigh with some effort as she turned more of her attention to her old companion, sitting on an ottoman before the blonde to tend to her. The clearing blood showed a horrendous laceration on Bronwyn's shoulder, the edges not properly clean or anything, and Winnie shortly showed her a red and shiny hand that could've sooner belonged to a novice dragon trainer than Bronwyn Nott. Lydia frowned and summoned some help from nearby. 

"Madame Puddifoot's, really? I liked it there," she commented with a bit of a pout. The healer poured Bronwyn a glass of Wiggenweld Potion, wishing that it wasn't such a rancid green, and held it out for the woman's good hand to take. "Drink this, you'll feel better. Emmeline was there, though?" Lydia chuckled darkly as she took up Winnie's injured hand, turning it over gingerly as she assessed the damage."Funny turn of fate, that. Trying to save Mary's happy place when there was a time she would've happily set the place ablaze with the girl inside...Did you accomplish what you set out to do?"

For she was curious, despite herself. As far as she knew, this was Bronwyn's first big event. The blonde had done a thing or two for the Dark Lord before, but he was becoming rather insatiable, wasn't he? If he asked his followers for this? To march nearly to Hogwarts' gates and destroy a place of peace? How will that help us prove we're better? She extricated the splinters using a spell, teasing them out as cleanly as possible with her wand until satisfied, and covered the injured hand with the thick orange burn paste. At least this one's coloring was tolerable, seeing as it went with the lasting scent of honey and beeswax, but she'd shortly dressed the wound loosely with gauze to hide it all the same. 

"I'll give you some more of this, just in case," she offered, spooning enough of the paste for several more applications into a glass container. Lydia looked to her friend then, truly looked, trying to find within the Death Eater the girl that she'd known. Bronwyn was still there - behind the wild hair and torn clothing, the adrenaline-fueled widening of the eyes. A half smile crept to her features as she set the container on the other's lap, and she smoothed back Winnie's hair behind an ear. "We're a far cry away from doing each other's hair and makeup, these days," she remarked with a fair bit of wistfulness, Healer hat off temporarily. "How are you feeling?"

[Bronwyn Nott]

She had to smirk as Lydia scolded Charlie, glad to see Lydia put him in his place. Thankfully he did stop yammering, and Bronwyn had to wonder how long it would be before he complained yet again. Winnie laughed as Lydia complained about her choice of place - personally, Bronwyn had hated the tea shop - and nodded in response. It wasn’t as if she’d made a choice to burn the place down when she’d headed out this morning, but that had just been where the chip had fallen. She took the potion without questioning, glad as she felt it get to work on the gash on her shoulder. She doubted the Order has a healer as good as Lydia was, and had to hold back a laugh as she thought of Emmeline crawling out of the wreckage of the place looking for help that wasn’t coming. There had been a time where they’d all suffered through a year of Emmeline’s seething hatred of Mary, whether it had been listening to her complain in classes they had together or watching her stare daggers across the great hall. “Things were going our way until Dumbledore showed up. That’s when we were dismissed. So I’d say yes, we accomplished something.” If it had been the goal their Dark Lord wanted was yet to be seen, but Winnie found herself not caring if things went his way or not.

She watched carefully as Lydia spread a paste over her hand, the cooling feeling nearly instantaneous at helping her burn. Magic really was special, and interesting, and something worth fighting to keep. She needed to remember that. She wriggled her fingers, smiling as Lydia brushed some hair behind her ear. “I’m feeling alright, really,” she answered Lydia, thinking back on their time in school. On all the makeovers given, all the secrets shared. All the boys cried over, at least on her part, as she failed to make each relationship she had work. And now she had something good, something real - at least as real as it could be. “Can we talk? Just the two of us?” she asked suddenly, giving Charlie a look. He didn’t seem pleased with her request, which was to be expected, but he did decide to leave the room to give them a bit of privacy. “I actually uh, I’ve been keeping a secret. Corry knows of course, she knows everything about me. And Regulus knows of course.” She fidgeted with the billowy robes she was wearing, glad for their large size in hiding one growing baby bump. “I’m actually pregnant.”

[Lydia Avery]

"Dumbledore came?" Lydia asked, intrigued at the notion of her old headmaster parading about as a shadow of his former "glory." "I would have loved to see that." Anyone with sense knew that You-Know-Who rivaled the power he'd held in his youth, and that Dumbledore had come to Hogsmeade's aid when it was only Death Eaters giving it hell…Didn’t expect them to dare come to your doorstep, Professor? Or - or was he there, too? Underestimation of an enemy was foolhardy, and Lydia felt that he shouldn't have relied on his reputation to protect his surroundings. The Dark Lord and his army had a show of force, and Dumbledore - he wasn't committed. Sure, there was the mysterious Order of the Phoenix, and its name gave a not-so-subtle nod to its founder - but Dumbledore was spreading himself too thin. He couldn't expect to properly manage a school and fight the fight effectively. And until he chose one way or another, the dark forces would only creep in further…

However, there was something in the way that Bronwyn described the outcome that gave Lydia pause, and halted her inner dialogue about the men trying to shape their world. She eyed her old friend cautiously, prodding with words and trained fingers as she assessed the damage to Winnie's hand. "Accomplished something. Excuse me for overstepping, if I am, there are things that Charlie's not at liberty to tell me either," she acknowledged conversationally, "but I can't help my curiosity. Did he…did he give you all a specific goal for the day?" Or are you and Charlie and Nicky out there getting hurt for no reason?

The healer had done most of what she could for Winnie, patching skin and providing relief, and the smile she received from the beautiful girl was like one of her own personally crafted balms. However, her curiosity was piqued again, and she wasted no time in waving Charlie away at Winnie's request. Lydia scooted to the edge of the ottoman as the door shut behind her husband, dark eyes bright, smile reassuring, even as Winnie admitted to a secret kept from her. There was a flash of old jealousy as she found out that both Cordelia and Regulus were already in the know, and while she prided herself on self-control, Lydia couldn't keep her features in check at the news.

Pregnant?! With - with Regulus’s baby?! How in hell -

    And you’re only telling me now? As your friend and self-appointed Healer, I am hurt.

What are you doing in the field when you’re having a baby?

    You should have come to me sooner.

Lydia suppressed a great sigh and rose, taking Bronwyn's face in her hands and kissing the blonde's forehead. "I'm checking on the baby," she declared firmly as she retrieved her wand from a deep pocket of her skirt, "and then we are discussing this, Winnie. If you don't want to tell me all of the details, you don't have to - " Although you should, you've always known my dirt. " - but the medical implications of - of all of this. All right?"

[Bronwyn Nott]

Bronwyn nodded to Lydia’s words, not surprised by the fact that Lydia was shocked that Dumbledore had came. Because hadn’t that been the point of attacking so close to Hogwarts? To drag the man out of the castle and into a place that he could be killed? Wasn’t the point of attacking Hogsmeade on a school weekend to show that even Hogwarts wasn’t safe? Bronwyn didn’t know, she wasn’t close enough to the Dark Lord to have that kind of knowledge. What she did know was that the Order members who had been there today trying to combat with them had been weak, and it almost made her laugh to think about it. She’d never considered herself as someone capable of killing (she wasn’t Meredith, after all), but there had been some satisfaction in seeing people hurt and struggling to escape them. At Lydia’s question, she chewed on her lower lip as she thought of an answer. She exchanged a look with Charlie, knowing quite well that there wasn’t exactly much she could say. “Well,” she said slowly, looking back to Lydia as the girl worked on her hand. “It wasn’t a specific goal really. He told us to cause chaos, to burn things to the ground. To not show any mercy, even when they begged for it.”

Bronwyn wasn’t surprised that Lydia was shocked by her news. She’d seen that same face from Cordelia and Rabastan when she had gone to them with the news. It was the same face she’d seen on Regulus when she had sat him down to tell him the news. She was surprised as Lydia stood and kissed her on the forehead - but not surprised that she was wanting to check on the baby. She stood up from her seat, carefully peeling off her robes.Her swollen stomach was now more evident after she discarded her robes, and she settled back down into the couch with her hands on her stomach. She hadn’t been to see a Healer yet, which she knew wasn’t the best. But she’d been reading books when she could, she’d been taking care of herself to the best of her abilities. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner,” she said, giving Lydia a smile, “I wasn’t exactly expecting to be in this kind of situation.” Running a hand through her hair, she gave a sigh before she continued. “I know I shouldn’t have been in the field today, but how am I supposed to go to the Dark Lord about this? I signed up to fight, not sit on the sidelines.”

[Lydia Avery]

The look exchanged between her love and her friend was unsettling, and Lydia almost regretted asking. But Charlie - he was simple. He had always loved the adrenaline of the fight, so it hadn't surprised her to find that the boy always raring for a schoolyard brawl had grown into a man committed to violent duty. That Voldemort allowed - nay, encouraged this behavior had perhaps fed her husband's belief that he had always been right to act with his fists and his wand. That he had been bred to perform these acts, and that the other purebloods needed him to protect their legacy with blood and malice. That what he did was for the greater good of their society, and therefore excused any discourse on ethics.

She and her friends had sent more than one weak witch or wizard to the Hospital Wing in their youth, so Lydia had not been shocked that Bronwyn and Meredith had chosen to continue down that path, even if their words had done as much damage as their wands back in the day. But even so, her friends were more complicated than the boy obsessed with dragons who'd learned to breathe his own fire, and as Winnie answered her… Lydia eyed her coolly, dissatisfied. Not in her friend, but in their chosen leader. You ask them for chaos, but don’t tell them why? Not that the “why” matters if it lands them here, but still. And perhaps that was why Winnie was seeming none too thrilled. She had been graduated for nearly a year, and what accomplishments were there to show for it?

...not that this was an accomplishment I’d ever think you’d claim.

After Charlie's departure and the revelation of Winnie's truth, Lydia was rather stunned. She didn't want to push Winnie away, however hurt she was at not being in on the secret. Obviously Winnie had had to make many decisions as of late about it, and her parents were not even aware? When was she going to tell them? When her child went to Hogwarts? Focus, Lydia. This is not about you. Winnie rose and disrobed, her midsection clearly revealed and rounded, and Lydia gave a tight smile back at the belated apology.

I wouldn’t have set his eyes on you if I thought this would happen.

An ugly guilt gnawed at Lydia's intestines, and she prayed that Regulus had not started behaving…ungentlemanly towards his fiancée. It was not unheard of for men of his stature to be demanding, but if this baby had not come to be from a consensual coupling, then Regulus Black would have hell to pay. But Cordelia knows - he wouldn’t still be standing…

Lydia briefly grasped the other's hand, giving a nod of understanding. "I appreciate that. I'm here to help you with this now, every step. I promise." She worked in quiet for a time, thoughtful as she checked the mother's blood pressure, laid hands on her stomach, smiled at the slight quickening within. "You did agree to fight for him," she continued quietly, "but could you not…say that you are preparing his next generation of devotees?" Lydia gave a weak smile to her friend and sat back on the ottoman, content at the baby's health, discontent with the situation entirely. "I don't know what you'll tell him, and we can keep thinking on it together, but you need to say something. You came out of today's fight without dire need of aid. But you can't count on skill or luck to get you to the end of this pregnancy if you keep fighting, Winnie." Her friend had been an athletic force during their school years, and while she was still in commendable shape, there was no doubt that her body, and its needs, were changing. "And I think you want to meet your baby, too, if you came to me with this today."

[Bronwyn Nott]

Bronwyn didn’t question the Dark Lord's commands, she knew better than that. At least, she didn’t question them in his presence. It was hard not to wonder though, if this was the right way to be going about things. If the words she’d been raised on were true. She’d always hated Muggleborns, because her parents hated them. And her parents friends. And all of her friends. It was the socially acceptable thing to do. But in all her years of schooling, she’d grown to know them. Not that she knew any of them well, but her year spent with Eddie and the Hufflepuffs has given her an insight she hadn’t expected - or talked about. Doc Dearborn was one of the nicest people she’d ever met, and she hadn’t made it easier for them to be nice to her. She’d tormented Mary MacDonald in school, simply because of blood status. She could be described as many things by people, but Bronwyn was starting to think things like kind wasn’t one of them.

And didn’t she want to be a kind person? She didn’t want to be cold like her parents, so devoid of emotion and love. She knew what love felt like, and she’d constantly been torn between denying who she was and living the life that had been planned out for her. And in her weaker moments, Bronwyn tried to let herself believe she was in love with someone who wasn’t Cordelia. It had been one of those weaker moments that had led to the conception of her child, when she wanted so badly to be in love with Regulus. She knew she wasn’t. She did love him, he was truly one of her dearest friends. But friends was all she could truly be to him, wasn’t it? She hadn’t talked to him about her feelings, still doing her best to play the good fiancée. But she hadn’t been to visit him the past couple of Hogsmeade weekends, worried someone would pick up on the fact that she was pregnant.

Meredith was going to be so smug when she found out, Winnie just knew it. Meredith already won the apprenticeship that they’d been head to head for during their last year of school. And now Winnie was unmarried and pregnant, with nothing to show for her life and work in the past year. Other than her work at the Ministry (where she had to work with Aaron of all people) she had done nothing truly exceptional with her life. She’d desired to go into Quidditch after her years at school, but her parents had told her that without a job in the Ministry she would be nothing after school. She regretted it every day that she’d listened to them, wishing she’d rebelled more as her friends had. Maybe then she wouldn’t feel so lost.

Tears sprung to her eyes as Lydia took her hand, promising something that Bronwyn had needed to hear. She’d trusted very few people with this secret, a secret that was growing harder to hide by the day. Lydia was skilled in her career, she would know what to do now. Because while she’d never considered herself to be the type to have kids, she was growing to love the child inside of her. It made her feel less alone in the world, somehow. Bronwyn watched as her friend worked, doing her best not to ask questions. She wanted to know more about the baby, but now didn’t seem like the time. She took in Lydia’s words when her friend spoke once more, nodding to them. Yes, she could say that she was growing the next generation to lead their world on. But she just wasn’t sure that she wanted to.

Then, there was no stopping the tears. She did want to meet this baby, she didn’t want to keep fighting. But she also knew she was in a weird place in life, and she wasn’t sure she’d have her parents continued support when they found out about the baby. She took a deep breath to calm herself, wiping at the tears before she looked back up to Lydia. “I never really thought about having kids,” she said, taking another deep breath to keep herself calm. “But I do want to meet this one. And I want him or her to live in a better world than the one we live in. I don’t want my kid growing up involved in a war.”

[Lydia Avery]

This was dangerous territory they were entering, in more ways than one, and Lydia hoped her Charlie was keeping his ears away. She sent a muttered "Muffliato," to the door just in case, handing her friend a handkerchief from her skirt pocket for her weary, weepy eyes. She listened, she felt, and her petty feelings at being kept in the dark about the baby were recognized as such. You don't want him to be involved in the war. So...the war's got to end before he's due. Or...you excuse yourself from service? But Winnie, no one leaves the Dark Lord. You don't hear of defectors. Because if they refuse him... Terrible images came to her creative mind, up from the depths of the horrors she'd seen at the hospital. It just cannot be done. You and Regulus swore your oaths. Have you fully lost faith in this cause?

The healer was attempting to postpone pregnancy herself, not wanting to leave her work, not wanting a child with a father always gone in a fight. But she was no Death Eater. If she did conceive, it wasn't as if she would then be trying to get out of a deal with the devil. 

"You have every right to want better, different, for your child," she said carefully, voice low in caution despite the charm. "But for him to not be involved...do you mean that you want to leave him?" Her dark eyes widened with significance and she leaned towards Bronwyn, hands finding hers, throat abruptly drying at the mere thought of the Dark Lord catching on. "You're scaring me, Winnie. I can't bear to think of what he'd do if he had any inclination that you wanted out. Have you spoken with Regulus about what you want?" The pair were engaged, and certainly this pregnancy was only solidifying their commitment to a future together. And while the boy was young, and while he'd taken his share of Bludgers to the head, the Dark Lord wanted his service. As a student. To be held in such esteem had to mean he had some sort of pull, didn't it?

[Bronwyn Nott]

Bronwyn accepted the offered handkerchief, dabbing at her eyes as she looked towards the door. This was a dangerous conversation to be having, that was something she knew. She didn’t know where Lydia’s feelings on the matter would lie. After all, hadn’t Lydia gone into healing as a way to help with the cause? To be able to spy on the other side, to be able to lead an enemy into an early death if the chance arose? And couldn’t Charlie, a death eater like Winnie was, be listening at the door? Would he report back if he heard anything that he deemed to be traitorous? Because that was how she had begun to feel, working as a Death Eater.

Her job at the Ministry was boring compared to her dreams of being in Quidditch, but it was stable. She wasn’t sure how they would react when she found out she was pregnant - but she felt safe there. There was no safety in the field, in the fight. She signed up to be a Death Eater because it was something she had wanted to do. To break down barriers, to fight what her father described as a man’s fight. To be as dangerous as Bellatrix and Alecto, which is why she’d shown up to the fight today. To fight with them, to earn her place among the respected. It had been hard to put her doubts aside, but she’d done that. And as terrified as she’d been, she’d followed Bellatrix’s commands to her in the field. But it didn’t seem right, killing innocent people for a greater good.

Lydia was worried, and Wyn knew that her friend had every right to be. Doubts about the Dark Lord and his ways were dangerous to have. People who doubted him died. And she didn’t want to die, she wasn’t ready for that. Giving Lydia’s hand a squeeze, she matched her friends low tone. “Of course I don’t want to leave him, it’s not that. It’s just...how long before we win? I want this baby growing up in a perfect world,” she said, hating that she was lying to one of her dearest friends. But this was safer, if only Regulus knew how much she was doubting things. “Regulus and I have spoken about all this, of course. We both just want the best for this baby, and we both know our roles in that.” She dabbed her eyes once again with her free hand, setting the handkerchief down on her lap. “I just don’t know how I’m going to tell the Dark Lord about this.”

[Lydia Avery]

By Merlin, but did Lydia hate this.

To not have answers, to not have a fix for her friend, to not know how to get her into safety. She'd understood Winnie and Mere's desires to prove themselves the betters of the men they had been raised to serve - she'd felt the same, in her way, and was working diligently and deliberately towards that unending end. But was working towards that ideal worth it, when something like this came to be? When perhaps the only safe way out was to fall back on what had been expected of them as girls? To plead for forgiveness and mercy by those who held the power? For all the progress that they made, it felt as though they moved one step forward for each ten steps back. Leaving the fight to care for this child - while Lydia did feel it was the responsible thing to do - would forever change the Dark Lord's view of her. Winnie would no longer be a soldier, but someone who he had far less use for. Even though she could continue in more passive service in a role akin to that which Narcissa Malfoy had made for herself, would she again be taken seriously?

Tough potion to swallow, but that's the way of it, isn't it?

"I'm relieved you're not planning to leave," Lydia spoke with a tense smile. "And that you and Regulus are on the same page, and willing to do what you must, even if the way is unclear." She sighed and worried at her lip, wondering just how much tough love would be taken by her today. Even if she leaves, the ideas will be there, and she can come to terms with it when she can. But it cannot be delayed much longer, for the baby's sake. "From what I know of him," she said carefully, "he's going to need to be convinced of your continued usefulness." For no harm to come to you and yours. "Stepping away from battles does not mean you cannot spread his word, or act as an informant. Have you thought about how else you could be involved?"